Teacher student relationship

If you sort of guessed this is about my relationship with my students in my professional engagement as a teacher in my retired life, you couldn’t be more wrong. The relationship I am going to talk about spans across the seas, via land, sea and air routes.

It is about what the India’s prime minister is teaching the American president. They are, if you have studied history of the past two decades or so, birds of the same feather and they are flocking together. Modi’s helmsmanship helping Trump weather heavy seas.

It was in November 2016, at the stroke of midnight between November 7^th and 8^th, Modi announced the so-called demonetization of high end currency, only to introduce a higher end currency soon after.

The date and timing are significant. At the dawn of next morning in the USA, give or take a dozen hours, Trump era began. Trump could not wait to get the transition period behind him. I would suspect he was re-enacting what Modi did before the latter was sworn in, inviting SAARC honchos to his swearing in ceremony. Here, Trump did, even before his administration was instituted, started talking about policy matters, sidelining the so-called China-one policy, praising Vladimir Putin, insulting Mexico, and kept waiting the “special relationship” card holder Theresa May waiting and all that. The student beating the teacher at his own game!

In the first week of his presidency, even before the executive branch was anywhere near being filled up, Trump used all kinds of executive powers he was tutored that he did have to get rid of TPP and more significantly, affecting the “undocumented aliens”, ordinary citizens and Green Card holders in the here and now, he “banned” entry of foreign nationals from a select few countries that just happened to have Muslim majority populations. This was par for him, as through the campaign, he asserted (I would not want to add the qualifier “falsely” which would imply that once in a while he speaks the truth) that terrorism is exclusively the product of Islam. Never mind, IRA was all Roman Catholic (years earlier).

Now, to the parallels between Modi’s demonetization and Trump’s entry ban executive order. If you feel exceptionally charitable you may say that the roll out of both was severely botched. If you do not feel so, both smacked of being the front end of the I-cannot-be-wrong mindset that both Modi and Trump harbour.

From news reports, all of them ostensibly “fake news” from the protagonists’ perspective, the minions were kept out of the loop. In the case of India, the governor of RBI was reduced to a rubber stamp. That perhaps was more inclusive than what Trump did to his secretary of defence and homeland security apparatus. Trump did better than Modi. Of course, Modi did not have Bannon at his side. Amit Shah is OK but he cannot do double duty, one at BJP HQ and the other at 7, Lok Kalyan Marg, the erstwhile Race Course Road.

What did happen in both the instances? Both of them walked back many steps, but seemingly moving forward. They were doing Michael Jackson’s moon walk, better than the dancer-cum-musician ever did.

Here, Modi was the teacher and, to be sure, he was not bettered by his acolyte. Thank the more responsive US judicial system.

The whirlpools both created are slowly draining out, but not before unleashing severe damage to the country, as much as to the protagonists’ egos. The student is raring to be the teacher and the teacher is refusing to let go his first-mover (by about 30 months) advantage. Let us wait and see. Hoping for lasting impacts.

Daring to dream is the job of the fool.

Raghuram Ekambaram

   

Modi calling Trump

“Dear Mr. Trump (this is how you like to be called), this is Narendra speaking”

“Narendra who?”

“Oh, I know you are too busy fixing up your team, on the fly ... of course you have a few more days before you can fly on Air Force One ... please be patient ... to answer your question, Narendra Modi, Prime Minister of India.”

“Now I recall; one of your acolytes tried promoting me amongst the Indians here but failed miserably... what do you want? I ain’t got whole day wasting my time on small talk ... I have to do a lot of jugglery to fix up my business(es). Get to the point quick.”

“I took office – there was this grand Swearing In ceremony – in which I stunned everyone and his cousin (see, I am quick to borrow your turns of phrase!) by inviting my counterpart of India’s archenemy, Pakistan.”

“So ...”

“The quick point is, you have room to learn from me too. Invite Vladimir Putin to your Inauguration Ceremony. I invited India’s enemy ... you do so with the only enemy of the US. The occasion demands it. That would stun not just the Dems, but also your enemies within – like the GOP establishment.”

“Hmm ... I ‘d ‘ve to think about that ...”

“Don’t take long ... after all you have to make sure you are a multi-billionaire (as you claim) even after you demit office (here is to hoping it is not too soon)...”

“You have a point, the...”

Modi interrupting, “Two, to be sure ...”

“Yeah ...  thanks for correcting me (you have no idea how much it hurts me to admit I made a mistake; if in the next call you correct me again, I will not take any more calls from you. Understand?). Now, what about me, to add fuel to fire, me walking down, waving and all that – what Jimmy Carter did, but with a twist – hand in hand with Putin! That is a good one, if I should say so myself!”

“Yeah, you are quick on the uptake, Donald (change my shift from Mr. Trump!). Get to work. Bye.”

Modi hung up. Trump was fuming, “No one hangs up on the President of the US!” The chief strategist Steve Bannon was in on the call and he knew the President-elect had to be calmed down.

“Now, now, don’t be a spoilt brat (I know it is hard for you to do) Mr. Trump. Modi did give you some sound advice. Take his first call after becoming the President and then take it from there. I agree, Modi sounded kinda condescending. If he continues, dump him. If not ...”

“OK, OK, you have earned your pay as my senior counsel. Just shut the xxxx up. I need to get back to business ... my businesses.”

Raghuram

P.S You must understand this is a sanitized version of the conversation; one in which a non-native speaker of English talks to another one who behaves like one is really not for public consumption. Deliberately, I retained one such Trumpism (indeed a common Americanism) and if you care, spot it.

   

Indian Republic Day, for Obama

Unlike Arvind Kejriwal, I am not complaining that I had not been invited to the January 26^th shindig along Raj Path in Delhi. I am enjoying the TV telecast of the annual, and should I say repetitive and boring, parade.

Yes, if one is honest with himself or herself, the only thing he or she would appreciate about this ritual is the capability of the government to organize this function, security and all. Of course, our PM showed courage to invite the mighty – I will have much to say on this later – US president to this event as the Chief Guest which none of his predecessors had the gumption to do. But, the question is, should our prime minister have done that?

No. Sorry for raining on Obama’s parade. Did I raise your eyebrow by saying that it was Obama’s parade? Apologies, but qualified – I was left with no option. As the parade was going on, I saw a line on the TV screen that proclaimed “SPECTACULAR DISPLAY FOR OBAMA”, yes, all caps and bold, but definitely ugly. It was not a display for the people of this republic called INDIA. Gag me with a fork, please.

For the past one week all one heard about the occasion of the nation’s 65^th Republic Day Anniversary, was that the US President will be the Chief Guest. We learned everything about His (capitalized deliberately) itinerary, how He would be welcomed, what He would be served and on and on. Oh, Agra lost out on His gracious visit, blame the Saudi Monarch who chose to die at such an inappropriate time. How dare he? Obama, at least till the events close, is God, for all who believe in God.

No one mentioned that Obama is enjoying the last few months before he will be anointed a “lame duck” president, if that has not happened already. We are, in a sense, basking in the reflected glory of a has-been, on OUR Republic Day!

There has been hardly a mention of how India has veered away from the principles of a Republican Government, by focusing more on the power structure by those in the formal structure of governance and outside of it, mostly the monied and capital class, which governs the country rather than the people who are the repository of the powers to govern – res publica, if you please. As I see it, the Indian public has not cared to restate, much less reaffirm the founding principles of OUR REPUBLIC.

I wonder how many Indian citizens, even among the supposedly well-educated will be able to make the distinction between the Indian Independence and Republic Days – of course, in the former, the Prime Minister gives the speech from the Red Fort and in the latter, (s)he sits alongside the Chief Guest for the day watching a boring (yes, I am repeating the adjective, because it is well deserved) parade. The President of India merely carries on the charade.

This is the Indian public. Do they deserve a Republic Day of its own? Maybe not. That is how January 26, 2015 became a “SPECTACULAR DISPLAY FOR OBAMA”.

We deserve what we got.

Raghuram Ekambaram

Arvind Kejriwal and the astrological geese

The news flash was that some people, and perhaps some stars and planets too, conspired against Nandan Nilekani and forced him to file his nomination papers during a  bad (read 

“inauspicious”) phase of the day. That gave me an idea to suggest the time Arvind Kejriwal should file his nomination papers for the high-profile Varanasi seat.

But, there are a few preparatory steps to take. Kejriwal must first assemble a gaggle of geese, that is a good metaphor for astrologers sitting cross legged, I suppose, after flying in from different corners of the nation. Apparently it takes at least five geese to make a gaggle. Here I would suggest, in light of enhanced status of humans vis-à-vis geese, that the quorum for gaggle be raised to a dozen.

Then, Kejriwal should ask the astrologers to consult his horoscope in conjunction with ALL the textbooks, ALL the practices across this vast nation which include Rahu Kalam,  Yema Kandam, palmistry, Nadi jotish (pulseology?), Numerology, alphabetology  – standard or non-standard, none excepted – of their trades. Kejriwal would then organize a brain storming session, no outsiders allowed.

Here comes the catch. The astrologers will be asked to identify the most inauspicious time for Kejriwal to file his papers in Varanasi, running against BJP’s Prime Minister-in-waiting Narendra Modi. The session, after what I expect to be a series of cantankerous meetings, will suggest the time that would guarantee that he will lose, indeed lose big, in the election to the parliament from that holiest of holy places, for the simple reason he violated all the tenets of astrology, Hindu astrology. This recommendation, Kejriwal will follow in letter and spirit.

If Kejriwal desires he may also convene another session to suggest the most auspicious time for him to file his papers from another “safe” constituency. This would be Daily Double  for the astrologers.

What is in these sessions for the astrologers? Besides the obvious monetary benefits, it is a win-win situation (literally) for them. They are guaranteed to win on two counts – when Kejriwal loses from Varanasi – which as polls indicate is a certainty – and when he wins from the “safe” constituency.

Astrologers, though their business has been flourishing, have been on the defensive of late. True, Narendra Dabholkar has been removed from the scene but there are enough pesky pests around. Statisticians gleefully note that astrologers’ predictions do no better than what a random pick would allow. Kejriwal affords them a virtual clinching argument in this debate, often acrimonious.

The group’s recommendations, sure to be followed by the candidate at both the locations, will cement the reputation of the astrologers among the aam aadmi. This is the least the self-proclaimed Aam Aaadmi Party (AAP) can do. One out of two correct predictions may be random, but two out of two, as definite to be in this case, is something astrophysicists will sell their soul for to confirm the remnants of gravity wave ripples during the inflationary phase of the universe, uncomfortably close to the beginning of time.

One may as well ask what is in this for Kejriwal/AAP. One word, credibility. As I had suggested in an earlier blog contesting as a sure shot loser does not validate Kejriwal’s position as a crusader. He has to be present in the parliament. But he must also have valid reasons for contesting from two constituencies and losing one. Astrologers provide the required rationale, for both.

Two birds in one stone; alas, neither is a goose.

Raghuram Ekambaram

Indian elections and quantum mysteries

The first time one hears about the famous double-slit experiment in physics, one returns perplexed, mystified. Indeed, that is the effect desired by the raconteur. The student must be introduced to the weirdness of quantum physics at the most basic level just so she would be able to take additional perplexities in her stride.

It almost feels like I am going through what that student would have experienced from the second telling of the experiment. I am talking about a candidate in Indian elections being able to contest from more than one constituency. The first time I thought about this situation was when Sonia Gandhi contested from two places, from Amethi in UP and Bellary in Karnataka, in 1999. The situation is being reprised at that level in the upcoming elections for the Lok Sabha.

The attention grabbing character this time round is none other than the putative prime minster, Narendra Modi, NaMo. He will be contesting from the high profile constituency Varanasi and another one from Gujarat (the name escapes me, if indeed it has been announced).

I draw a parallel with the double-slit experiment in more ways than one. The easier is the straight forward one, the first thought that comes to one’s mind – which constituency would he discard if he won from both? This is precisely like asking which of the two slits did that photon not go through! In case he wins both, during the campaign he must have been, just as Sonia Gandhi, lying to people of one of the two places, of his willingness to represent them in the parliament. Would a Gujarati have been lying to the masses of that state? Perish the thought. But, Varanasi, the stairway to Heaven, particularly for the RSS man, beckons.

As an aside, should anyone be aware of the debates in the Constituent Assembly that endorsed our Constitution, please do let me know why it did not stipulate that a candidate can contest from only one constituency in any particular election.

Back to the main discussion, to ratchet up the complexity. Just assume, and here I will be stepping on the toes of the NaMo faithful, that he lost the high-profile Varanasi contest (not unthinkable, but with longer odds than Jayalalithaa appearing in a court in Bengaluru). What happens to NaMo’s street cred to lead the country? I believe this is the thinking behind our street fighter Arvind Kejriwal choosing a direct fight against the BJP supremo.

It is not as though should NaMo win Varanasi, Kejriwal retires unhurt. Kejriwal has something to lose, without a doubt. If he had chosen a “safer” constituency to contest, he could have claimed that being in the parliament and serving the people came first for him, whichever constituency, never mind it being “safe”. Now, he has painted himself in a corner. If he lost Varanasi, the AAP parliamentary party (with strength of how many ever seats) will be without its acknowledged leader. Or, will Kejriwal pull a fast one and do a NaMo and contest from an additional seat? It gets curioser and curioser.

This is what happens with more complex versions of the double-slit experiment. It now appears that even if the experimental set up is changed after the light particle left its source, it still figures out how to adjust itself and pass through the “right” slit (it is far too complicated for me to explain, but this is the crux)!

So, Indian elections are quantum experiments!

Raghuram Ekambaram

What would India have been …

Narendra Modi is reported to have said that “India would have been a different and better country had Patel been the first Prime Minister in place of Nehru”.

The occasion, celebrating Sardar Vallabhbhai Patel’s 138 birth anniversary, may have induced the Chief Minister of Gujarat to delve into unrealized past possibilities. I am not going to try to rain on that parade. But, this looking into the past to construct scenarios sits very uncomfortably in my mind and I can explain why by constructing another one here.

Yes, there have been many million investigations, by the highest in the land like the Chief Justice of the US Supreme Court and sundry others, on who assassinated John F. Kennedy about 50 years ago in Dallas. Yet, there have been no definitive answers, including even the number of rifle shots heard. We do know the suspect list is an international Who’s Who, ranging from CIA, KGB, the mafia, FBI and so on. I will leave all of that to the people whose curiosity is stoked by such weighty matters. My scenario and the wonder it may cause will linger on the lighter side.

Just suppose, in the manner of constructing a scenario, that in the aftermath of the Cuban Missile Crisis and the accompanying perception (as wrong as it may be) that Khrushchev blinked across the table from Kennedy, the former was assassinated, and till date there are controversies surrounding who really the assassin was, who, if anyone, was the mastermind. In what way, then, would world affairs have changed?

I do not know, but the ONLY valid scenario I can construct is this. Aristotle Onassis would not have married Khrushchev’s widow. Can you do better? I think not.

Well, that is how all these “what if …” pronouncements should be treated, be it by Modi or anyone else, be it at the 138^th birth anniversary celebrations of Patel or any other occasion.

Raghuram Ekambaram