The Best Detergent for Washing Away Empathy from Your Mind – Religion
Amongst Thamizh Brahmins, there are rules to show even sympathy to someone who has lost a dear one. One shalt not call on (or even telephone, send an SMS or a note on WhatsApp to) the bereaved family on the third/sixth/eighth (for example) day after death, and definitely not after sun down; and also on, certain phases of the moon. The above is merely a short list.That is, even showing sympathy is time-prescribed and -limited. All of the above are dictated to by superstitions propped up by religions and none can take away the props.
If that is for sympathy, merely imagine the case for empathy. Thou shalt not empathize with the bereaved. For the uninitiated, empathy is putting oneself in the shoes of the person/family that is grieving. It is not, “I feel sorry that he lost a dear one,” rather, “I am feeling the pain he is feeling.” This comes vividly in the teachings of the Buddha.
Yet, empathy is not only sad events. The Buddha also talked about empathetic joy. You are feeling a good happening to others as happening to you. No competition between your neighbour and you! Think about that the next time you go for a new car. You are buying a car for yourself and not to show your middle finger to your neighbour!
I am not singling out Thamizh Brahmins. I am sure there a number of communities that have such rigidities, all imposed by religion. Only because I am a Thamizh Brahmin (a lapsed one, for sure) and can talk with relative confidence only about them.
Raghuram Ekambaram
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