The things to be done, not to be done etc.

I sort of asked myself, particularly when the tribe of former CECs getting together in defense of the Election Commission of India about covering up all the elephant statues in Uttar Pradesh, what other things are going to be covered up in due course as each state is gripped by elections and, of course, the granddaddy of ‘em all, the elections to the Lok Sabha.

Perhaps, during Lok Sabha elections, the entire nation will be covered by a membrane of an appropriate color, as dictated to by the CEC and distinct from all the colors in the flags of the various parties!

The list of things to be covered / hidden, or to be prohibited from happening in an extended timeframe (enough allowances for six or seven phase elections and such) is given below, along with the names of the parties the things covered are supposed to represent. I have used the Biblical moral imperative “shalt” wherever possible to stress on the inviolability of the commandments.

1. The Sun shalt not rise in TN – DMK  
2. The Sun shalt not shine in AP – Praja Rajyam Party
3. Nowhere shalt lotus flowers bloom – BJP
4. No Ambassador cars shalt be plied on AP roads – Telengana Rashtra Samithi
5. No cycles shalt be ridden on roads (they shalt be locked up out of sight) – Telugu Desam Party (AP); J & K National Panthers Party (J&K); Kerala Congress (Kerala); Samajwadi party (MP, UP, Uttarakhand); Manipur People’s Party (Manipur)
6. No one shalt sit on a chair (empty chairs shalt be stowed away) – Uttarakhand Kranti Dal (Uttarakhand)
7. No flowers shalt bloom; no grass shalt grow – All India Trinamool Congress (Paschimbanga; Meghalya) [Why be state specific when it is a national party?]
8. Corn shalt shed their ears and sickles shalt be hidden – CPI
9. No hammer shalt be used and sickles shalt be hidden – CPI (M)
10. None shalt offer any blessings with an open hand, all the hands of Gods offering such blessings shalt be broken (to be repaired after elections) – Indian National Congress
11. All houses shalt remain unlocked (as a concession, they may be closed) – All India United Democratic Front (Assam) [Why be state specific when it is a national party?]
12. No one shalt live in a bungalow – Lok Jan Shakti Party (Bihar)
13. The lion cages in zoos shalt be covered up (with lions inside!) – Maharshtrawadi Gomantak Party (Goa); All India Forward Block (Paschimbanga)
14. No mangoes shalt be eaten in TN – Pattali Makkal Katchi
15. No water hand pumps shalt be left uncovered in Uttar Pradesh – Rashtriya Lok Dal
16. No hurricane lamps shalt be lit – Rashtriya Janata Dal (Uttar Pradesh)
17. No spade or stoker shalt be used – Revolutionary Socialist party (Paschimbanga)
18. No branch of any tree shalt have two leaves together in TN, Puducherry and Kerala – AIADMK [Why be state specific when it is a national party?]; Kerala Congress (Mani)
19. No one shalt wear spectacles in Haryana – Indian National Lok Dal
20. No one shalt use a tractor in Haryana – Haryana Janhit Congress (BL)
21. No one shalt fly into Goa – Save Goa Front
22. No one shalt use an inkpot and a pen (this is no restriction at all!) – J & K Peoples [note the absence of the apostrophe] Party (J&K)
23. No plough shalt be used – J & K National Conference (J&K)
24. Arrows shalt be off limits in Jharkhand, Bihar – Janata Dal (United)
25. Bows and Arrows shalt be off limits in Jharkhand, Odisha and Maharashtra – Jharkhand Mukti Morcha; Shiv Sena
26. None in Jharkhand shalt comb his or her hair – Jharkhand Vikas Morcha
27. Lady farmers in Karnataka and Kerala shalt not carry paddy on her head – Janata Dal (Secular)
28. Use of clock is absolutely forbidden in Maharashtra – Nationalist Congress Party
29. No ladder shalt be set up slanting in Kerala – Muslim League Kerala State Committee
30. None shalt read a book in Manpur – National People’s Party

And on and on …

But before concluding, one last statement – when Assam goes to poll, would the EC of India be stupid enough to cover the elephants in green tarps? Going beyond Asom Gana Parishad whose election symbol is the elephant, even the state may want the EC of India stay of its elephants!

Raghuram Ekambaram

References

1. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_political_party_symbols_in_India